#consumer reports

Donna L. Tapellini for Consumer Reports:

A quick look at our newest computer Ratings tells an interesting story: Despite the release of the new Windows 8 OS, many Windows 7 computers are still available from a variety of retailers, and several top our Ratings. If you’re shopping for a new computer right now, there are some good reasons to opt for Windows 7.

Probably the best endorsement of Windows 8 yet, given Consumer Reports recent tech track record

Larry Magid on the latest Consumer Reports joke of a story about some Facebook users “sharing too much”:

When Consumer Reports writes about home appliances, it tells you their strengths and weaknesses but I’ve never seen any dire warnings about how you can lose your hand if you stick it in a garbage disposal. Even when they review cars, they don’t fill their articles with awful statistics about how thousands die each year as a result of drunk or reckless driving. There are lots of reviews of cell phones but never have I seen headlines about how easy it is for strangers within earshot to hear your half of a private conversation when you’re on the phone.

What do you do as you grow increasingly irrelevant? You start writing batshit crazy and/or inflammatory things to insert yourself back into the conversation — no matter how stupid you sound.

Instead, I’ll link to Marco Arment’s tweet ripping Consumer Reports for — wait for it — recommending the new iPad as the top tablet on the market. 

Yes, just a couple weeks after “WarmGate" failed to light a fire under consumers, Consumer Reports has decided it will probably look better if they recommend what will become the best-selling tablet of all time. As we saw with the iPhone 4, it doesn’t really matter what they say anymore.

I’m going to give myself a large pat on the back for this one following their initial report on March 20:

We will absolutely have a follow-up story from them tomorrow. And probably another one the next day. Then one contradicting what was previous said (which they’ve already done, of course).

The cycle is complete.

This Consumer Reports headline almost makes it seem as if you’re going to be holding a hotplate. The reality is that it’s only about 12 to 13 degrees warmer than the iPad 2 at these warm levels. And more importantly, farther down in the CR story:

During our tests, I held the new iPad in my hands. When it was at its hottest, it felt very warm but not especially uncomfortable if held for a brief period.

That’s in line with what I said in my initial review:

One other slight downside which I have to assume is related to either the battery or the LTE functionality is that unlike previous iPad models, the new iPad does get noticeably warm in the lower left corner after prolonged use. It’s never hot, just warm. But again, I never noticed this on other models.

It definitely runs warmer (which CR says is directly related to processor-intensive gaming — read: the graphics part of the A5X chip) than other iPads have previously. But it’s not a big deal. 

Phew! Thank god. Clearly their reports last year really hurt iPhone 4 sales and destroyed Apple’s business. 

Consumer Reports is very important and influential, you see. There’s no actual data to back this up. And they sure seem like more of a link bait farm. But you must respect their authoritah!

Seriously, all the Consumer Reports iPhone hoopla did last year was prove that no one actually gives a shit about Consumer Reports anymore. 

Humorously, they still put the iPhone 4S behind a bunch of shitty Android phones. Like one of those 3D bullshit ones