This Consumer Reports headline almost makes it seem as if you’re going to be holding a hotplate. The reality is that it’s only about 12 to 13 degrees warmer than the iPad 2 at these warm levels. And more importantly, farther down in the CR story:

During our tests, I held the new iPad in my hands. When it was at its hottest, it felt very warm but not especially uncomfortable if held for a brief period.

That’s in line with what I said in my initial review:

One other slight downside which I have to assume is related to either the battery or the LTE functionality is that unlike previous iPad models, the new iPad does get noticeably warm in the lower left corner after prolonged use. It’s never hot, just warm. But again, I never noticed this on other models.

It definitely runs warmer (which CR says is directly related to processor-intensive gaming — read: the graphics part of the A5X chip) than other iPads have previously. But it’s not a big deal. 

Devin Coldewey on DisplayMate’s tests of the new iPad screen:

The new display is sharper than any screen its size and has better color representation than most home displays and HDTVs.

This is a screen that you hold in your hands and touch. It comes with a computer attached. This is the future but it’s here today. For $500, no less.

Well I set this one up, didn’t I?

Just imagine if the product hadn’t been such a massive letdown for everyone.

Snark aside, it is sort of interesting that Apple didn’t issue a release touting any actual numbers. They tend to do that when they have something to crow about. Instead we just get Tim Cook saying it was a “record weekend” when talking about the stock dividend/buyback this morning. 

That’s almost an Amazon-like move.

Update: Boom.

Is a Google-branded Nexus tablet coming? Yes.

Will it be any good in the sub-$200 price range? That’s the real question.

It may be good compared to the Kindle Fire. But is that good enough? Like it or not, even at 7-inches, it’s going to be compared to the gold standards of tablets: the iPad.

And I still just find it very hard to believe that a sub-$200 tablet is going to be able to hold a candle to the iPad. Unless Google/ASUS plans to sell it at a significant loss. Which they won’t.

The easiest way to sell something cheaply is to make it with cheap components. And that never seems to translate to a great device.

Reads like parody, but is sadly just click bait. Click bait spread over three pages, no less.

Some of the intro is pretty great though:

I tell you this because about 55 million of your fellow tech consumers have been lining up like lemmings, getting ready to jump off the iPad cliff, once again. Don’t get me wrong. I acknowledge that there is some value to an iPad. But just because all your friends are buying the latest and greatest “new” iPad (what we previously thought would be the iPad 3), that doesn’t mean you have to, as well.

Reads even better when you consider the ending:

Yes, I’ve ordered one.

So what are the 16 reasons? Well, one is “you already have an iPad”, stating that the odds are that you already have an iPad — because clearly most people in the world already do. Another is that Apple doesn’t allow porn in the App Store. Another is that it’s too big, which directly contradicts the earlier stated reason that the screen is too small. Related: another is that “it’s still not 16x9”. 

The rest range from poorly thought-out, to poorly argued, to garbage.

Truly great list.

Man, it’s too bad Apple is unraveling.

And those people who sold their Apple stock in October sure look smart today. It’s only up $200-a-share since then. Why not $300? Total slackers.

Meanwhile, don’t look now, but Apple’s market cap is double Microsoft’s market cap. 

Says Apple:

Customer response to the new iPad has been off the charts and the quantity available for pre-order has been purchased. 

Such a damn letdown of a product. Can’t believe it took two whole days to sell out pre-orders worldwide. Man, Apple is slipping, that’s for sure.

Adrian Kingsley-Hughes:

Between the release of the iPad 2 last year and the announcement of the new iPad yesterday, Apple has nearly doubled the capacity of the battery, taking it from 25Wh to a massive 42Wh. Measured in milliamps this boosts the battery from 6944 mAh to a monstrous 11,666 mAh.

That’s a massive, massive jump in the same basic space (ever-so-slightly bigger). This is perhaps the most significant thing only briefly mentioned yesterday because the ramifications are huge for many other products.

As John Brownlee notes:

That means that Apple’s work in battery density is not only going to open the door to an LTE iPhone 5, but could give us all-day MacBooks sooner rather than later.

During the keynote, I noted that I remembered the days when my laptop battery would give out before an Apple keynote was over. It was only a few years ago. Yesterday, by the end of the event, my MacBook Air was at 65%. What if Apple is close to a 20-hour laptop?